Advice  to  Teenagers

FRIENDSHIPS

🙌I bless you, my dear Reader, to have real, good friendships and relationships. God wants you to be surrounded by good friends, that you support them and they support you.

But how is a good friend❓

1 Corinthians 13 describes God's perfect, unconditional love. But a good friend is like that, too. God helps us to be as loving as this, since Christ has poured His own Spirit into our hearts.

❤️Love is patient, kind,

does not envy.

💚Love doesn't brag.

🩷Love does not behave hurtfully,

💗 does not look for his/her own benefit,

💙does not get angry too fast,

💜does not blame others for the wrongs...

🤍Love believes all things and hopes all things, love never fails...

This is how God loves us! And by grace He makes our hearts so good too that we can love with His divine love! After all, we have received a new heart in Christ.

This is how you recognize a good friend, that he/she is like this, or that he/she strives to be like this.

Holy Spirit can help us not to have too high expectations of others, but to choose carefully whom we let come close to ourselves as friends. After all, we share our lives and our hearts with our friends!

With God's help, we can be good friends, be honest, forgive if and when necessary.

AN EXAMPLE FOR A GOOD FRIEND: NATHAN

I think Nathan's behaviour is a good example of friendship. Nathan was a prophet alongside King David. God revealed to him what the king had done. Something very bad: he seduced the wife of one of his most loyal warriors and eventually killed the husband. The prophet Nathan then had to correct the king 👑 in love!

📕 ‭1 Corinthians 13:6 NIV‬

"Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth."

He had to tell the truth in love and convince King David to repent. But that was a dangerous endeavour! Because if David hadn't repented, he could have even gotten offended by Nathan and he could have executed Nathan to hide his sin.

But Nathan received wisdom from God. He told David a story about a little lamb that was a poor man's favorite. The poor man slept with it, ate with it. But the rich man slaughtered it because he was sorry to slaughter one of his own sheep for his guest. 

When David heard the story, he became enraged and wanted to have the rich man executed. Then Nathan told him that this was not a true story, just a story to teach him. It was David himself who was the rich man with great wealth and many wives, yet he seduced the poor man's only wife. 

Finally king David repented and turned back to God - thanks to Nathan's bold love.  

🙌I wish you and us friends like Nathan, who don't always just nod, when they see that we make poor decisions or hurt others - but warn us and show us how to follow the good, the wonderful calling of God. 2 Samuel 12 verses 1-9.

JONATHAN

Jonathan was a wonderful friend of David. He loved David so much that he always supported him.

Jonathan knew that David was chosen by God to be the king. Although Jonathan would have been the next king according to inheritance, he was not jealous of David and even helped him.

JESUS, THE TRUE FRIEND

But your truest, best friend, our friend is Jesus, who sacrificed His life for you. He suffered so that we could be freed from diseases and poverty, that He could live with us in our hearts and so that we can be able to love others unconditionally.

He always shows us how to do good, because we hear His voice. He is happy when we walk in love and do good - because of His love. We can love others through His power.

JOSEPH, HOLY AND BRAVE

 Joseph, Jacob's son worked as a servant of Potiphar and his master's wife tried to seduce him. The temptation was great, but he still resisted. He tore himself from the woman's hands in such a way that his clothes were also torn. He ran away. 

Bad company corrupts good morals, says the Bible. 1 Cor 15, 33. But if we avoid situations that lead to temptation, if we even run away from them, then it is easier.

 Joseph went through many hardships, but in the end he became the leader of Egypt and saved the whole world from famine. He always chose to do good. This is also our calling! Because of Christ, by grace, we are able to do this. Not by our own power. 

So there is a great reward for someone who follows JESUS and is primarily loyal to Him, who is the best friend. 

WHO IS A GOOD FRIEND FOR ME?

 For me, the most important thing is that my friend should be a believer. Because then we can pray together, study the Word, learn from each other and give each other really good advice. 

Of course, this does not mean that I do not talk to and encourage those who do not believe in Christ. But that is not a friendship yet... 

If our friendship is also important to the other person, it should be reciprocal. So my friend should contact me, initiate talks and meetings. It shouldn't always be me who initiates chatting or meeting. 

If the other person doesn't expect me to think like him/her about everything and doesn't get offended if I don't take all his/her advice right away - well, that means a lot. It's nice to accept each other's differences, it's a sign of respect. Then we are free to make our own decisions. 

But Jesus Christ is more important to me than any friend. I run to Him when there's a problem. It is not a human friend, whom I tell about my problems first, but first I pray, I read the Word, I listen to Him, because all other relationships come after Him - in the order of importance - and only after I have talked to Jesus in prayer can we really have a good conversation.

WORDS ON FRIENDSHIP 

THE FRIENDSHIPS ARE COVENANTS

‭Psalms 26:4 TPT‬

"I won’t keep company with tricky, two-faced men, nor will I go the way of those with hidden motives."

‭Amos 3:3 NLT‬

"Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction?"

‭1 Corinthians 15:33 TPT‬

"So stop fooling yourselves! Evil companions will corrupt good morals and character."

FRIENDS HAVE TO BE CHOSEN 

‭Psalms 55:12-14 TPT‬

"It wasn’t an enemy who taunted me. If it was my enemy, filled with pride and hatred, then I could have endured it. I would have just run away. But it was you, my intimate friend—one like a brother to me. It was you, my adviser, the companion I walked with and worked with! We once had sweet fellowship with each other. We worshiped in unity as one, celebrating together with God’s people."

‭Proverbs 20:19 TPT‬

"A blabbermouth will reveal your secrets, so stay away from people who can’t keep their mouths shut."

‭Luke 21:16 TPT‬

“You can expect betrayal even by your parents, your brothers, your relatives and friends—and yes, some of you will die as martyrs"

‭James (Jacob) 4:4 TPT‬

"You have become spiritual adulterers who are having an affair, an unholy relationship with the world. Don’t you know that flirting with the world’s values places you at odds with God? Whoever chooses to be the world’s friend makes himself God’s enemy!"

TRUE FRIENDSHIP IS A TREASURE

‭Proverbs 17:17 NLT‬

" A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need."

 ‭Proverbs 18:24 AMPC‬

"The man of many friends [a friend of all the world] will prove himself a bad friend, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother."

‭Proverbs 27:9 AMPC‬

"Oil and perfume rejoice the heart; so does the sweetness of a friend's counsel that comes from the heart."

‭John 15:13 AMPC‬

" No one has greater love [no one has shown stronger affection] than to lay down (give up) his own life for his friends."

A true friend is selfless and the best example is Jesus. Obviously, it is important to take care of ourselves, to avoid being used by false "friends" and only Holy Spirit shows us how far we should go in self-sacrifice - it does not often happen that we really have to give our lives up for another person. 

But it's definitely wonderful if we are helpful and when we focus on what we can do for the other person to be a blessing to him/her -nand we don't constantly think about what we expect from others.